21. Texas. I like bands. I like taking pictures. I like superheroes. Nothing really special here


sgtjimbarnes:

I decided to go back and finish it.
voldesnorts:

im-in-wonderland:

strangelyobsessedwithstuff:

vialsofbrightforgettingpowders:

ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS

YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.

NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING

NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE

GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED

IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGESthanks for the tip karkat

SERIOUSLY THIS SHIT IS AMAZING AND IF YOU DON’T HAVE CANOLA YOU CAN USE OLIVE FUCKING BELIEVE ME AND MY FINE ASS LEGS

" your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic" I AM LAUGHING WAY TOO HARD
I HATE Arnim Zola

ussecretlittleartists:

I was watching ‘Everything Wrong with Captain America: The First Avenger’ and I got to this scene. image

Yeah, this one. And I fucking lost it. (Again, because who doesn’t hate Zola with a burning passion to rival the depths of hell?)

Because when Steve Rogers is confronting Schmidt, I was…

(Source: cptsassrogers)

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Hold my fucking hand, loser. We’re using the buddy system for the rest of our lives.

- How I’m going to propose  (via jovitaramos)

(Source: keepmywhiskeyneat, via prisonerofsauron)

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meladoodle:

yeah i understand you’re charging me for bank robbery, but i licked the money so therefore it is mine

(Source: meladoodle, via dogfromup)

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intensional:

refreshes:

intensional:

what’s a school without cool!

sh

wtf don’t sh me.. let me finish my joke…

(via kingg--park)

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twirlingtroye:

ashkenazi-autie:

eileenthequeen:

eileenthequeen:

So apparently in my sister’s class, there was a trans girl that had been on the cheerleading squad for a while. When she came out, the other girls on the squad made the agreement that whatever boy made fun of her would never get a date. And if you think that’s not the most metal girl alliance ever, you can sit down.

Wow, 500 notes

Girls protecting girls.

why does this not happen where i live

(Source: passive-aggressiveprincess, via prisonerofsauron)

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dickspeightjr:

howiemandel:

rainbowwaterfall:

that’s a lot of butter.

there are fucking google eyes staring into your soul from every angle and you comment on the butter

to be fair it is a lot of butter
Don’t ever compliment me by insulting other women. That’s not a compliment, it’s a competition none of us agreed to.

- "You’re not like other girls." Shut the fuck up. (via cutely-perverted)

(Source: escapedgoat, via ohgodimsickofsleepingalone)

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